Grief Has Many Faces

Today my thoughts are on the many faces of grief. This emotion that takes control, casts you down into a pit, stomps on you, steals your joy, fills you with anguish, rides your back like a Gorilla, clutters your mind with fear, doubts and hopelessness

Is death the only time in my life where I have felt these feelings? What about you? Does any of this read familiar to you? I think that we stock up our grief in little piles within and never let go. Why do we hold on? Let me speak for me: because I wanted to preserve it, without even realizing it. Why would you want to keep grief locked up inside? Maybe it’s fear of the loss of something you have felt safe with, or the fear of being vulnerable.

What are my piles that I’ve stacked up? The separation and abandonment of both parents at 7 years old; losing my grandmother as the next caregiver in line to care for me in the absence of my parents. I grieved the loss of my innocence for over 30 years, the violations that stole my purity.

There, I’ve said it. It’s out. These were my grief piles that I had forgotten about. Locked them away and never wanted to re-visit them again.

What are you grieving? Perhaps you are struggling with grief and through my sharing, you might identify your piled up grief moments that you have never let go of. Maybe it’s time to address them, so that you can be free, so you can move on.

You can still find joy in the midst of the challenges of life. The Joni Eareckson Tada Story (click here)

My Son, You Are Alive Yet My Heart Grieves

“A wise son brings joy to his father, but a foolish son grief to his mother. Proverbs 10:1”

A son of mind is a source of grief. He was raised with values and the knowledge of right and wrong. I don’t know what happened. When they are young you have control but when they grow up they make decisions sometimes contrary to what you have taught.

At times I hear myself saying, “If he would only. . . “Nothing will change in his life until he decides to make the change. I grow weary but I hold on to the promises of God in the 23^rd Psalm: The Lord is my shepherd I shall not want.

Today is the day you have made, Lord, though I struggle with this burden on my heart, help me to lay it at your feet once and for all. My mother once said, “When they are young they are on your lap and when they get older, they are on your heart.”

I never understood what she meant until I experienced it first hand. He is mine. Lord, help me to remember that he belonged to you first.

Son, I love you, and I won't stop praying for your new life.

Mom  

Can Dogs Grieve?

I asked myself this question a year ago when we loss Pete one of our three dogs at the time. Pete just couldn’t seem to grasp certain doggie concepts, like pee and crap outside. We would take him out but he thought that was time to run, jump and play, something his previous owner conditioned him to do.

What I liked about Pete, he was teaching the oldest member of the family Destiny how to run, jump, play with toys, to have fun. We thought that would never happen. They would spend hours romping around, a far cry from what she thought were her previous duties, which  was to guard my husband at his computer.

And one day Pete was no more. For the next couple of weeks I watched Destiny dealing with grief, pacing back and forth, looking in every room for Pete. She didn’t whine the loss but her wanderings spoke loud and clear that she missed her playmate. This went on for about a month, walking, and sniffing around, wondering where her friend was. By a month and a half she had bounced back to her old self again, back to guarding my husband at his computer.

There are steps to grief. Animals grieve differently than we do but what is noticeable is the change in their behavior.

Human emotions are much more complicated and some people grieve for many years. I met this lady who still wanted to die at the loss of her daughter. This had been awhile. Remembering her made me think of the Brown family and the murder that has plagued OJ Simpson. Years later they are still stuck in grief and it has turned to bitterness and anguish.

I can’t tell you if my Destiny was grieving her loss but her actions for a few weeks made us aware that she too suffered a loss.

Have you read the Story of Hope? Great story the courage of one dog facing a death sentence at www.print2publish.com.